Mama Speaks

The days of my life before motherhood seem so far away, yet I remember. I remember when I felt fat and hideous wearing my size 8s.  How I would LOVE to be that "fat" again. Another thing I remember is my expansive underwear collection, most of which consisted of thongs.  In fact, my only other underwear were my "period underwear."  C'mon ladies, you know you have a pair or two.  The ones that don't make an appearance in rotation until that special time of the month comes around.   The ones you wear because you don't care what Mother Nature does to them.  Period underwear exist in the last phase of undies before they go to retirement at the county dump. Anyway, I remember having conversations with some people (kept anonymous for their privacy) about my "gross thongs." "How can they be comfortable?" "Why even wear them?" "Yuck!" Of course, I defended my butt floss adamantly.   "They're comfor...

Last night, my future sis-in-law/babysitter/friend, Danielle, called me.  We played phone tag, heck I even pocket called her!  When I finally answered her, after first rejecting her call on my cracked phone whilst trying to answer, she said she had something to tell me.  Of course, I always expect people to tell me they are pregnant, which in this scenario would not be possible.  Anyway, she told me that as of May (the end of our school year) she will no longer be watching Ayla. This hit me like a ton of bricks.  I wasn't blindsided by this though.  I've known that this was always a possibility and probability.  But it didn't make it any easier.  In fact, I cannot even sit here typing this blog without getting all teary-eyed. Logically, I know Ayla will be okay.  She will thrive, in reality, and probably love being around lots of kids and working on a learning curriculum with teachers.   I'm just not sure if I'll be okay. To unde...