"The great joy in life is doing what people say you cannot do."
Wednesday. Happy hump day! My day has been rather uneventful, though my frustrations about teachers in my county not getting a pay raise or level of experience "step" and the public's negative reaction to teachers in general (i.e. "Get over it teachers, enjoy your paid summers off"--which by the way are not paid!!) has me hot under the collar. But I'm not going to expand on that.
My sweet little Ayla is a hitting, kicking, mean-machine. I arrive to pick her up. Slap hello. Buckle her in the car seat and lean in for a kiss. Slap. Take her to the park for a half hour and amazingly do NOT get smacked. Arrive home to get her a snack and milk. Slap me, slap my laptop. Time out number one. Sorry, hugs, kisses. Two seconds later, she is swinging a book at me. Time out number two. Make Brandon talk to her.
The frustration level I have with her over these behaviors is boiling. Last night, she hit my mom's dog (Molly, who Brandon and I rescued when I was 7 months preggers) with the lid to the lego box. Time out. Then, when trying to talk to her at the end of her time out, she held her hands in the "clapping" position and slapped both my cheeks simultaneously. She clapped my face!
I am not pro-spanking or pro-hitting, at all. I have a background in Early Childhood Education. I don't believe in those methods. But I will admit, I have "slapped" Ayla on the hand twice. It is a very light tap, but I'm not justifying it. The first time, I hated the fact I'd done it. I did it again last night, and let me be the first to tell you, it didn't work. She screamed in my face. She didn't flinch or cry or do anything except scream. When she went into time out, that's when she screamed. She screamed for 2 minutes solid. I usually get her after 1 minute (literally with a timer), but I had to let her screaming settle down a bit. Her cheeks were bright red.
Everyone has advice and has me convinced I'm just a terrible mom. I mean, she only does it to me, so it must be me right? Whatever. It hurts my heart because she can go from sour to sweet to sour again (think of those Sour Patch Kids commercials) in the blink of an eye.
Brandon and I have many very good systems in place with Ayla, such as always letting the other know when she has been dropped off/picked up to assure that we know she is not in the car. We also take over for each other when our patience has been taken to the limit. So Brandon took Ayla to take her bath.
Like amnesia, my memory disappeared as soon as my cell phone rang. Brandon called me (from the room next door-haha) and told me to come to the bathroom. Ayla pooped in the potty! She kept looking at it and saying "Ew," but we couldn't be prouder, clapping and exclaiming, "Yay!"
What a rollercoaster this parenthood is...
My sweet little Ayla is a hitting, kicking, mean-machine. I arrive to pick her up. Slap hello. Buckle her in the car seat and lean in for a kiss. Slap. Take her to the park for a half hour and amazingly do NOT get smacked. Arrive home to get her a snack and milk. Slap me, slap my laptop. Time out number one. Sorry, hugs, kisses. Two seconds later, she is swinging a book at me. Time out number two. Make Brandon talk to her.
The frustration level I have with her over these behaviors is boiling. Last night, she hit my mom's dog (Molly, who Brandon and I rescued when I was 7 months preggers) with the lid to the lego box. Time out. Then, when trying to talk to her at the end of her time out, she held her hands in the "clapping" position and slapped both my cheeks simultaneously. She clapped my face!
I am not pro-spanking or pro-hitting, at all. I have a background in Early Childhood Education. I don't believe in those methods. But I will admit, I have "slapped" Ayla on the hand twice. It is a very light tap, but I'm not justifying it. The first time, I hated the fact I'd done it. I did it again last night, and let me be the first to tell you, it didn't work. She screamed in my face. She didn't flinch or cry or do anything except scream. When she went into time out, that's when she screamed. She screamed for 2 minutes solid. I usually get her after 1 minute (literally with a timer), but I had to let her screaming settle down a bit. Her cheeks were bright red.
Everyone has advice and has me convinced I'm just a terrible mom. I mean, she only does it to me, so it must be me right? Whatever. It hurts my heart because she can go from sour to sweet to sour again (think of those Sour Patch Kids commercials) in the blink of an eye.
Brandon and I have many very good systems in place with Ayla, such as always letting the other know when she has been dropped off/picked up to assure that we know she is not in the car. We also take over for each other when our patience has been taken to the limit. So Brandon took Ayla to take her bath.
Like amnesia, my memory disappeared as soon as my cell phone rang. Brandon called me (from the room next door-haha) and told me to come to the bathroom. Ayla pooped in the potty! She kept looking at it and saying "Ew," but we couldn't be prouder, clapping and exclaiming, "Yay!"
What a rollercoaster this parenthood is...
Oh sweetie you are an amazing mom as I have witnessed first hand and you have nothing but love for your daughter! She is testing you and only you because you are her mother...and that's what they do! It is a phase, do not worry and keep on doing what you are doing! Be consistent and firm and know that my children, ALL three of them (yes Blake too) have made me boil many times and will so many many more times! Love you babe!
ReplyDeleteJust another ordinary day...you are sure to have many more rollercoaster rides and they will be enough to keep you on the tracks. You are awesome because you are a thinker and part of a great team. You will never pick the quick fix but will pursue the best by being consistent. I have every confidence in you. As for Ayla, she is figuring out who she is and she loves/trusts/ and feels so safe with you that she can be her worst and know she is still loved. She will test and flucuate but in the end you and Brandon will be her example. I have no doubts, considering the source, that she is (even on the bad days) growing into a wonderful little person!
ReplyDeleteAnonymous, who are you? Thank you for the wonderful comment. Made my day!
ReplyDelete