Anger

I have to say, I am rather embarrassed to even go here, but I have a serious temper/anger problem.  It doesn't come up often, but if I'm stressed beyond belief, I really just snap.  It has been like this for years, and it isn't something I want to keep up.  Tonight, I couldn't find my purse anywhere, and after losing my wallet recently, I couldn't take anything else!  I was slamming doors, swearing, and literally on the floor beside myself.  Feels like someone just took over my body...

I guess I need to figure out a better way to cope with the extreme stress of a situation rather than falling to pieces and throwing a grown-up sized tantrum.  I'm not quite sure how to change this old habit, but the Irish gets the better of me, and I'd rather not set that prime example of what not to do for Ayla.

Phew.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Babies

I want another baby someday, but I'm afraid. Truly.  I so very much want to have another sweet little one, another pregnancy (for all its ups and downs), and I want A to be a big sister. But I'm afraid.  I am afraid of those moments when I feel like I've gone "'round the bend" as Alice would say (we've been watching the Tim Burton version daily, sometimes more than once).  The things I've been through paralyze me with fear of having another--the stresses, the worries and sleeplessness, the anxiety and classic post-partum OCD thoughts... Those things made me feel, and still do at times, like a failure of a mother. But you know what?  I am a good mom.  I might even venture out there to say I'm a great mom.  There are certainly things I'd do differently and areas I still want to work on presently, but I feel like someday, when Ayes is all grown up, she will look back and know I did the best I could for her.  I hope that she will feel tha
Read more

"The great joy in life is doing what people say you cannot do."

Wednesday.  Happy hump day!  My day has been rather uneventful, though my frustrations about teachers in my county not getting a pay raise or level of experience "step" and the public's negative reaction to teachers in general (i.e. "Get over it teachers, enjoy your paid summers off"--which by the way are not paid!!) has me hot under the collar.  But I'm not going to expand on that. My sweet little Ayla is a hitting, kicking, mean-machine.  I arrive to pick her up.  Slap hello.  Buckle her in the car seat and lean in for a kiss.  Slap.  Take her to the park for a half hour and amazingly do NOT get smacked.  Arrive home to get her a snack and milk.  Slap me, slap my laptop.  Time out number one.  Sorry, hugs, kisses.  Two seconds later, she is swinging a book at me.  Time out number two.  Make Brandon talk to her.   The frustration level I have with her over these behaviors is boiling.  Last night, she hit my mom's dog (Molly, who Brandon and I rescue
Read more

San Pellegrino, Juicy Juice, and Gerber--oh my!

Image
Our family has recently marked the beginning of our journey participating in the Nestlé boycott .  I won't re-write the posts that have inspired me with information, but I will cover some highlights.  For the entire article, please visit PhD in Parenting here .  Author Annie pointed out the following issues with Nestlé and their practices: Controlling and abusing water sources Purchasing from suppliers who utilize child slaves Anti-union/anti-collective bargaining behavior Advertising formula in a harmful and misleading way (especially in emerging countries where clean water isn't available, see video below explained by brilliant mom blogger Jessica Gottlieb .  Yes, she's in her pajamas.  Mom bloggers rule!) Now, I will be the first to admit that this information isn't brand new to me.  I read some of facts above a few months ago, and I decided it was a battle I wasn't going to fight. Then the information was in my face again, and this time, I couldn't
Read more